Hunters Unlucky - a novel in progress - Commentshttp://www.abigailhilton.net/hunters-unlucky-a-novel-in-p/All content copyright Abigail Hilton, may not reproduce without permissionen-USSquarespace V5 Site Server v5.13.159 (http://www.squarespace.com)Jason K. comments on Part 6, Chapter 6Jason K.Mon, 20 May 2013 19:43:34 +0000http://www.abigailhilton.net/hunters-unlucky-a-novel-in-p/2013/5/19/part-6-chapter-6.html#comments798245:12761851:comment/20032784I'm not quiet positive what happens to Storm's nose, I _think_ Teek bit him. Might want to expand that a bit.

]]>Abbie comments on Part 6, Chapter 3AbbieMon, 20 May 2013 15:46:43 +0000http://www.abigailhilton.net/hunters-unlucky-a-novel-in-p/2013/4/28/part-6-chapter-3.html#comments798245:12761851:comment/20032199Yeah...I know I've lost some of those things in the new version. That scene in the old version seems cheesy and clunky to me as an adult, but I'm sure it would still seem awesome to many kids and mid-teens. The problem is, I don't know how to lay on the right amount of cheese anymore. I can't see it. All I can see is bad writing.

It may very well be that I'm turning the story into something more interesting to my current audience (composed mostly of people in their late teens to late 30's) than to the 10-15 year-old audience that enjoyed it when I first wrote it (and of which I was a part).

Hopefully, there are scenes in the new version that are awesome in their own right and make up for whatever was lost from the original.

]]>Jeff comments on Part 6, Chapter 3JeffMon, 20 May 2013 05:58:43 +0000http://www.abigailhilton.net/hunters-unlucky-a-novel-in-p/2013/4/28/part-6-chapter-3.html#comments798245:12761851:comment/20031294As a young reader, I remember that moment between Teek and Treace in the first version was so powerful to me I actually cheered out loud...in a library. Looking forward to seeing what has changed.

]]>Maymunah comments on Hey, this book has an end!MaymunahWed, 15 May 2013 07:43:46 +0000http://www.abigailhilton.net/hunters-unlucky-a-novel-in-p/2013/5/13/hey-this-book-has-an-end.html#comments798245:12761851:comment/20018745Eeeee that's so exciting, congratulations on reaching the end. That many words on a complex story with a lot of worldbuilding while writing other things and doing irl stuff may not be your best, but it's pretty impressive.

]]>Jason K. comments on Part 6, Chapter 4Jason K.Tue, 14 May 2013 15:18:55 +0000http://www.abigailhilton.net/hunters-unlucky-a-novel-in-p/2013/5/5/part-6-chapter-4.html#comments798245:12761851:comment/20016921Nice way to warp up questions and plot points without using a lot of data dumps.

]]>Lisa comments on Hey, this book has an end!LisaMon, 13 May 2013 22:12:57 +0000http://www.abigailhilton.net/hunters-unlucky-a-novel-in-p/2013/5/13/hey-this-book-has-an-end.html#comments798245:12761851:comment/20015216I'm so excited! It is really incredible to learn what you decided to keep and what you took out, and how the newer version deviates from the original. I'm glad you plan to keep the commentary; it is very insightful and interesting. :)

]]>Lisa comments on Part 6, Chapter 4LisaThu, 09 May 2013 03:35:45 +0000http://www.abigailhilton.net/hunters-unlucky-a-novel-in-p/2013/5/5/part-6-chapter-4.html#comments798245:12761851:comment/20006324Ooh, really exciting!

]]>Maymunah comments on Part 5, Chapter 16MaymunahTue, 30 Apr 2013 12:47:04 +0000http://www.abigailhilton.net/hunters-unlucky-a-novel-in-p/2013/3/24/part-5-chapter-16.html#comments798245:12761851:comment/19982497A genuine creasia serial killer, that's horrifying. I understand why Treace feels empathy for Moro, but sometimes empathy is not the right reaction. And there's Kos again, oh dear, Treace's new territory is going to be like a forum for all the sociopaths and their friends...and victims. Maybe Arcove should've just killed Treace's whole clutter.

]]>Maymunah comments on Part 5, Chapter 15MaymunahTue, 30 Apr 2013 12:45:27 +0000http://www.abigailhilton.net/hunters-unlucky-a-novel-in-p/2013/3/17/part-5-chapter-15.html#comments798245:12761851:comment/19982492I did think Arcove was being too lenient with Treace and his cats and risking too much in the process, even though slaughtering all of them would be awful. This is a good middle ground, and I respect Arcove more now with the extra information provided by his POV.

]]>Abbie comments on Part 6, Chapter 2AbbieSun, 28 Apr 2013 01:31:33 +0000http://www.abigailhilton.net/hunters-unlucky-a-novel-in-p/2013/4/21/part-6-chapter-2.html#comments798245:12761851:comment/19978089Hey, Courtney, thanks for the comment. I'll see whether I can work in a little more build-up on the second pass. I think it's fairly obvious that Storm is saying what he thinks will most likely cause Teek to leave. It's even possible that the Arcove and Roup think Storm is making it up to get Teek to go.

From inside Storm's head, it's less clear, because the logic of getting Teek to leave is all mixed up with his guilt and the fact that he suspects Teek will learn the truth somehow eventually and hate him for it.

Storm makes several internal comments leading up to his confession that show it's on his mind. Things like "There's something else he won't thank me for" show that his guilt is eating at him. He thinks the secret will come out eventually. I could have Shaw threaten to tell Teek unless Storm carries through with sending him back to Leeshwood. Not sure. Shaw is the only person who Storm has told in this version, and they're not really speaking at this point.

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